Poetry for the People

Because I enjoy poetic prose and well-executed poems, I subscribe to “Poetry” magazine. Each issue contains about thirty poems and the back section includes three literary commentaries. I usually read all the poems. 

I don’t know what to make of the commentaries so I typically skim over them, looking for nuggets. One of them caught my eye with “tempered by the dailiness of the life,” and, because I love new words, I had to read it all. 

That was fine so I went on to the next commentator, who had written a review of a new poetry collection by Michael Robbins, called Alien vs. Predator. I didn’t know any better. 

Mr. Robbins writes the most unpoetic stuff about unpleasant things I try not to think about, using coarse language I’d rather not read. That’s fine, too, for people who think it’s funny or creative enough to fill their heads with and want to buy his book. Land of the Free and all that. 

The reviewer, though, made me mad enough to spit. She’s a pro, no doubt, and a master wordsmith worthy of the magazine editor’s acclaim. But that she had such glowing admiration of Robbins’ technique, saying he “brings talent to the toilet” and “we melt with admiration” of his “whizzing wordplay,” coerced me into writing about poetry again.

She gives this acclaim for the poet after having just professed, “For many people, admitting to a fondness for poetry is like admitting to a fondness for a mechanized floral armchair: it’s too pretty, and anyway, they don’t get how it works.” She seems to imply Robbins’ coarseness and commercialism is the answer, at least to the pretty problem.

I understand (I think) where she’s coming from but I must vehemently disagree.

I think ordinary people have lost their fondness of poetry because the art lost them; it has surrounded itself with obscure intellectual dust and the smell of something fetid in Denmark. Academics have touted writing because it fits a form or is clever. The People have coughed it up and spit it out and declined to repeat.

Just let me assume that you are an ordinary person who has lost her fondness for poetry. Would you be more apt to pick up and read a poem titled “One Hundred Leaves,” or one called “Pissing in One Hand”?

I’m not suggesting crass subjects cannot be addressed poetically, although it is not my preferred reading. Poems are effective tools for everything from war protest to advocacy for school reform to seducing a woman. Isn’t the whole point of a poem to suggest something without actually saying it?

The grass is green. That’s prose. The spring morn swept over the verdant lawn. That’s poetic. The dog pissed on the grass. That’s pathetic.

I believe God inspires real poetry for the benefit of ordinary man and I refuse to cower before intellectual snobbery to call something poetic when it’s only clever word jiggling. O clever man, bereft and distraught, take your poetry back: buy a book!

May I suggest House of Light by Mary Oliver, Refusing Heaven by Jack Gilbert or Time and the Tilting Earth by Miller Williams?

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Breathing Deeply

I think the hummingbirds left for Mexico last week. I filled the feeder anyway, just in case. The cat next door is getting fat. Because her owners slept in and she thinks she’s missing breakfast, I gave her a few bites of smoked turkey. It is forecast to rain this weekend, yet if the bird baths aren’t full, I’ll carry water out.

My eyes aren’t watering this week, the traffic sounds different and I’m craving chili. As I look out at green trees, verdant lawn and sunshine, I say it must be spring. The calendar says otherwise. It’s autumn and the landscape should be yellow.

A front moved in last night. I stepped out to check the temp and thought I heard rain hitting the foliage. Outside the protective porch roof, I decided not. The sibilance was only the north wind rustling leaves not as soft and pliant as they once were. By the end of the week, they’ll give up and lie down.

Wind from the north is clean. It blows away the Texas dust, Gulf humidity and by-products of manufacturing. Come winter, I can breathe more deeply. 

Texas winter is not typically frigid, yet we freeze. A body gets accustomed to being too hot so a bit of a chill sends us seeking more heat. We wear the same wooly coats, high boots and felt hats that Floridians don in that sunshiny clime, not only because the fashion designers tell us to. We think we’re cold.

We’re driving down to Galveston in a couple of weeks. There, the breeze always blows off the Gulf, it’s always humid and it’s almost always warmer. There, we will board a ship and go even further south, down to the Yucatan where we can wear sun block and go swimming with dolphins.

When we get home, it will be November cold. Nice and cold, so I can wear my wool coat and breathe deep, make a fire and write poems about snow.

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Get Out of God’s Way!

I’ve been in the doctor’s office a lot lately. I suspect I may have done it to myself.

I had a urinary tract infection. I visited two different doctors in two states for a total of three office calls. Antibiotics three times. I tried all the herbs I knew, including Pipsissewa, Goldenseal root, Echinacea root, Dandelion and maybe some others. After about a year, it simply went away “on its own.”

I got a sore shoulder. I wouldn’t stop going to the gym and it grew worse. My sister had warned me about the antibiotics I was taking for my UTI, being suspect in tendonitis and having landed her in a wheelchair.

I tried the chiropractor. He said my x-rays looked so bad I’d surely be on a surgeon’s table within two years. I said I would not. He said, “Yes, you will, if you don’t let me take care of it.”

I let him manipulate my shoulder twice. It hurt so bad I went home and used ice packs and took naproxen sodium. The third day, I called it off.

I figured out which exercises at the gym were aggravating my shoulder problem and stopped doing all upper body work for about three months. It got better, I kept stretching and now I have about ninety-eight percent of my range-of-motion back.

Next I had a sore tooth. My gums felt swollen and the tooth felt loose. I made an appointment with the dentist, who took x-rays, couldn’t find anything wrong and prescribed antibiotics. I got thrush.

When you’re my age and your vision fades enough you need magnification to read, you get glasses. They recommend you get a check-up at least every two years, at which time they generally increase the strength of your glasses. It was time.

The optometrist expressed alarm at the change in my left eye. He scared me into seeing an ophthalmologist. The expert found my optic nerve “not as pink as it should be,” wrote down “atrophy of optic nerve” and ordered MRI scans.

The MRIs revealed an enlarged parotid gland, which “could be a lymph gland.” Say what? Is it a lymph gland or not? The experts aren’t sure. Seems it’s rather like the tonsils of the 1950’s–we don’t know what it does so let’s take it out!

They found nothing wrong with my eye, except it doesn’t see well. Last week it was atrophied; this week it’s not. And now you say I need to see an ear, nose and throat specialist?

They told me the ENT’s office would call for an appointment and I went home. They haven’t called yet but I have my speech all ready. God is healing; get out of his way!

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The Three R’s

“Reduce, Reuse and Recycle!” has become the trendy mantra of our times. Some of the youngsters among us probably think recycling is a new thing, exclusive to this generation. The motivation may be new but the idea is older than dirt.

With my parents’ history of the Great Depression experience, our family didn’t give much thought to “reduce.” It was automatic and assumed.

“Don’t put more on your plate than you can eat,” warned Mom. We had to eat what was dished up and she made soup out of the leftovers.

The ability to create transparently thin potato peelings was a virtuous skill to be practiced and cultivated.

We never bought paper plates, detergent came in a crushable paper box and hand soap was in a bar.  Diapers and towels were washed and baby wipes hadn’t been invented.

Mom reused practically everything, including newspapers to line the Guinea pig’s cage, coffee cans for temporary flower pots and mayonnaise jars to hold liquid leftovers. When they started putting margarine in plastic tubs, she filled the cupboards with them.

When I was a kid, we recycled pop bottles because we needed spending money–two cents apiece that would buy two pieces of sugary pink bubble gum. Ah, for the days!

Now we live in a big city and we have a special bin to recycle about half our garbage. My husband is an air conditioning contractor and he gets paid to recycle all the metal parts of the broken-down equipment he replaces. I “blove” it!*

I detest the plastic shopping bags all the stores are using now. They won’t hold half the groceries of a paper bag, offer no protection for breakable items and let everything fall over in a jumble. On slow days, when I think of it, I take my reusable bags. Most of the time, I have to placate my conscience by recycling the flimsy things.

Reducing the use of disposable things is not so easy nowadays. We eat a lot of fruits and veggies that don’t take much wrapping but what about rice milk, cereal, fruit juice, laundry detergent, motor oil and eggs?

Maybe the old-timers were better at it than we are. They squeezed their own oranges, returned milk bottles for a refill and saved cartons for the lady down the road who kept a flock of laying hens.

What do you think? Are we any better at The Three R’s than previous generations?

*Blove–See “Let’s Coin a Word” blog from June 29, 2012.

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Will Not Work for Food

One-Eye and Stubby

One-Eye and Stubby, eager to eat

     I “blove” cats and miss having one of my own. I’ve been feeding special tidbits to the cat next door for more than two years now. It took weeks to get her to come to me and more weeks before I could touch her head. Now she rubs me all over and bites when I’m ready to stop before she is.

     Of late, she’s been telling me her bowl is empty and I thought her people were being quite negligent. Then I discovered the true reason–a couple of frisky kittens.

     The cat food thieves look to be around three months old, siblings of yellow and white, and homeless. They came boldly into my yard, begging shamelessly when they heard me call “Kitty, Kitty” to the neighbor’s elegantly marked tuxedo cat.

     That they are brothers is undeniable, as they must have been close to identical until one lost his eye and the other lost a couple of inches off his tail. One-Eye and Stubby is how I think of them.

     Stubby is overtly friendly, insisting on a head rub with his food. One-Eye is a bit skittish, not having his peripheral vision intact. I thought briefly about adopting one of them or suggesting to my husband that the little stub tail is rather cute. They’re both adorable when they play…but who wants a half-blind cat?

     Visiting on an elderly neighbor’s porch, I found out she’s been feeding them her expensive dog kibble. “I won’t let them starve,” she assured me, wagging her head about the irresponsibility of people who have allowed or caused this situation. She doesn’t much like cats.

     I am slowly losing the vision in one eye, and unless the ophthalmologist can figure it out pretty soon, I could eventually be just like the blind cat, bereft of my peripheral abilities and growing skittish, unsure of my footing and jumping at shadows.

     When I walked into the yard yesterday, all three cats were meowing for food. One-Eye kitty was the one who hung around after eating, lazing under the carport while my husband worked out there. He does rather grow on you.

     Who wants a half-blind cat? Maybe a half-blind author.

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Dissonance with Resonance

     “What is wrong with your eye?” the optician asked. Well, you’re the doctor, I thought, but I didn’t say.

     “I don’t know,” I told him. “It doesn’t see very well and doesn’t seem to be correctable, even with these trifocals.” And I giggled.

     He was probably thinking, Duh! Tell me something I don’t know. But he didn’t say. He worked some more at getting me to see straight. He magnified and brightened to no avail. He asked me why I was laughing.

     His frustration led me to an expensive visit with an ophthalmologist at the University of Texas, more tests, smeared mascara, pupils the size of dimes and an appointment for an MRI.

     That’s a Magnetic Resonance Imaging scan. I know because I looked it up on the Internet. I’ve heard these letters M-R-I for years but I’ve never actually had one. I wanted to know what exactly the “magnetic resonance” was going to be shooting into my body. I needed to know how much it cost and whether it was going to hurt my brain as well as my wallet.

     This expensive gizmo uses “nuclear magnetic resonance” to take a picture of “nuclei of atoms” inside the human body. It “aligns the magnetization of some atomic nuclei” in the body and uses radio frequency fields to “systematically alter the alignment.” *

     Say what! I don’t want my atoms altered. And if you’re going to align my magnetization, I want all the atomic nuclei to come out the same as they went in. I like my face just the way it is, wrinkles and all.

     I had the test done early this morning. I drove myself there, squinting at street signs in the dark, half asleep, in congested city traffic. (The MRI guys knocked off a hundred dollars if I’d schedule at a ridiculous hour no one else wanted.) I let the technician talk me into taking my eye makeup off. (If I’d only known, I could have skipped the mascara and slept another five minutes.) I endured an hour and a half listening to fog horns and jack hammers and being very still with my head in a plastic basket.

     I paid the bill, instead of taking a three-day cruise leaving from Galveston the first week in October and sipping cold drinks on exotic islands in the Caribbean and watching manatees play in turquoise waters.

     This adventure proved to my hubby that I can find my way out of a paper sack and not get lost. I confirmed I’m not claustrophobic. If I’m very lucky, in just a few more days, with only one more test, two more doctor consultations and a slew of lab bills, I’ll be able to call that optician up and answer his question, “What’s wrong with your eye?”

     If I think of it, I’m going to tell him I’ve not stopped laughing. I’ve heard it’s good for what ails ye.

 *Referenced Wikipedia article here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Magnetic_resonance_imaging

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The Speed that Kills

     Tooling down the highway at four miles over the posted speed limit, I am ever so careful to stay alert. I have never (thanks be to God) been in a serious accident. I hope to never be.

     Good sense tells me to take extra care when I’m practically bumper to bumper with semis, going 75 miles an hour, driven by sleepy truckers.

     Especially considering my car is small and silver and apparently hard to see (given all the times someone has cut me off), I don’t want to be in a smash up at high speeds, so do everything I can to drive safely and defensively.

     I keep both hands on the wheel when things are congested on the blacktop. I make myself wait until the traffic is cleared a bit to start munching on an apple or fiddling with the radio. I consider myself a safe driver.

     On a long road trip this past week, I was caught up in a big construction mess. Two lanes of fast-moving vehicles suddenly decelerated to a crawl. Stopped, in fact: first gear, clutch to neutral, first gear, neutral, brake. I got excited when my tach revved up to 3,000 rpm’s and I shifted into second gear, thinking we were going somewhere.

     In my little ground-hugging car, I couldn’t see anything beyond the brake lights of the vehicle in front of me, so I did what he did. I hugged the edge of the pavement and used curves in the road to get a better perspective.

     Argh! The line snaked on for miles. I called my husband to say I might be home later than I thought. I poured water over the ice left in my cup. I ate chips. I found more relaxing music. In other words, I let down my guard.

     On the edge of the highway, I saw a highway patrol car and wondered if an accident was what had congested the traffic. There were no emergency lights and the truck and car stopped in front of him didn’t have any apparent damage. Our line crept on.

     I decided these guys may have had a little fender-bender but they weren’t the reason every vehicle traveling I-35 South was being forced to crawl along in the sweltering heat.

     How ironic, I thought, to have an accident at seven miles an hour, rather than at seventy. Better, of course, because bodily harm is less likely, but oh, so unnecessary. I wouldn’t like it at all, especially if it was my fault I crammed into a stopped car while digging lip balm out of my purse. I wouldn’t like it if it was done to me, either and (Grrrr!) the culprit better have good insurance.

     Life is like traffic, sometimes. Maybe if we know there is danger in our way–a temptation to lose one’s temper, an opportunity to gossip, pornography on the Internet–we are ever so cautious and on guard.

     It’s when thing seem to be rocking along smoothly and at a snail’s pace that we get ourselves in trouble. At times like this, slow is the speed that kills.

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Spam and the Devil

I have twenty-eight spam messages in my email and it’s only nine o’clock in the morning. How frustrating! It seems the vilest offenders seem to find a backdoor in spite of the best efforts of software geeks devising ways to block or separate them.

These spamming computers, or the people behind them, are trying to sell me everything from insurance to sex to (illegal) prescription drugs. I don’t want any and I don’t like it.

I try to get rid of some of them, the ones with ugly words or that hit on me every hour, by blocking the senders. They simply change their addresses. I’ve even had my own email address sending me spam.

On my blog, a computer program blocks spam from showing up in my readers’ comments, by separating them and then asking me to approve or delete them. What a wonder! Without it, none of our eyes would be safe.

I have to question why people would use a computer program to send unsolicited, unwanted ads to folks, just so they can go click, click, click and delete them unread. I suppose that one person in a million will actually read an ad and then of those 50 million ads sent and 50 read, a couple of gullible souls will buy.

But what about the rest of us? What about the 49,999,998 left suffering pure aggravation? Ah! The computer doesn’t care!

Spam emails are just like the devil. He inundates us all with solicitations to do wrong because it will look good, taste good or feel good. He tempts the good people, the Muslims, the Christians and the Jews alike.

I suppose he thinks if he hits us hard, often and for enough years, eventually we’ll capitulate and buy the package.

Photo from Wikipedia

Devil

SPAM devil!

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Must I Grow Old?

Today I accompanied an elderly relative to see her dermatologist. This dear lady is recently widowed and is still recovering from a broken hip. On this visit she had a cancerous growth removed from her face.

I parked my car close to the door, got her walker out of the trunk and helped her up the sidewalk. A gentleman held the door for us.

In the office, I answered the questions written in a type so tiny no one could possibly decipher it without bifocals. I ran interference with the staff when they asked questions hard to understand and I wondered what would have transpired had I not been there to help.

I want to say, this woman has spunk. She’s using a walker, driving a double-cab pickup truck and finding her way around this big city better than I can. She argues with the doctors, is bold about what she wants and generally gets what she needs.

Though I admire the ability of the elderly to cope with all life throws at them as their health and abilities decline, I rue the day when I am in their place.

Because I do not envy the thinning hair, wrinkles, false teeth, arthritic pains, blurry vision or loss of memory, if I have any choice in the matter, I’d rather not grow old.

I’m wondering what purpose God has in mind when he lets all these bodily malfunctions fall on humankind as we age. I speculate it may help us get to a place of resignation, so that death is more acceptable when it comes. Possibly old age teaches us humility. Perhaps it is a mercy that we have these latter years for reflection on the purpose of life.

When we are old, kids are grown and independent, careers are over and we have more time to think about our Creator.

Now that I’ve reached “middle age,” I’m thinking maybe if I spend more time and effort getting ready for eternity, I won’t have to grow old. If I’m ready now, can I just skip the icky part?

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Generational Degeneration

     When in correspondence with a friend, I described our office storage as being “Fibber McGee’s closet,” he reminded me of our age difference. He pointed out that he grew up with “oldsters,” else he wouldn’t have known what I was talking about.

     I’m not a contemporary of the fictional radio show character, either, and I was probably nine or ten when I asked my mother what she meant by Fibber McGee’s closet. Much like Archie Bunker or Lucy Ricardo or Dick Van Dyke, his name and funniest gags lived on for many years.

     For people of a certain age or those who’ve been educated by those oldsters, the expression brings to mind an amusing picture of a storage mess so jammed and crowded with disorganized junk, it tumbles on the head of any poor soul who unadvisedly opens the door holding it all in place.

     I do sometimes refer to things my readers may not be familiar with–maybe a piece of art or music, sometimes an olde English word, perhaps the use of medicinal herbs or a phrase in French or Latin. My intent is not to show off my grand education (inside joke there for my friends) but to use these unfamiliar things in a context where the reader learns something new. I enjoy learning in this manner so I presume other people might also.

     I think it’s unfortunate we have been encouraged to “write on a fourth grade level” so our readers will feel comfortable. Now it seems my friend is telling me to write for the twenty-first century and I am balking at that too, at least a bit.

     If we all write only contemporary language, how will the kids remember oleo, Nehi and Captain Kangaroo? How will they know where we got the phrase “dial the phone”? The retro song lyrics, “I’ve got a brand new pair of roller skates; you’ve got a brand new key,” won’t mean a thing.

     Kids are probably already wondering why some of us refer to our keyboard’s “enter” key as the “return” key. (Do you know?)

     The generation is degenerating. I think writers have a responsibility to slow the slide. What think ye?

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